Summer Days-2 Month Break from Life
by Invaders Ally and Jessie
Summary: Kat's been kidnapped, but by who? Ally goes to enlist the help of Dib and Daz, but where's Zim? And is Jhonen Vasquez mysteriously envolved somehow?
1. United under one cause? Hah!

Foreward: Yes, yes, I'm back. I've been sitting at this computer for quite some time. And I have been here, reading stories as well as writing. My computer, however, has prevented me from reviewing stories with pathetic excuses. I really wanted to review some of them too. 

This next story is based on true events, only slightly altered to make it all the more amusing to readers. Really. 

I'd also like to dedicate this to my friends Daz and Kat. Not having seen much of either in quite a while, I feel quite sorry. I really do. So this little story is about them. And me, too. It's here in the IZ page because Dib's in it quite a bit, and Gaz too. I might put Zim in it later. 

Oh, right: 

DISCLAIMER

Satisfied?

Summer Days

"What do you MEAN, you won't be here?!"

"Just what I said. My parents told me I don't need a computer during the summer, because I don't have any schoolwork to do. Heh."

"You're laughing about this? Tell me Kat, what exactly do you find amusing in this? The entire summer! That's two whole months!"

"I know that."

"Two whole months! That's 60 days, 1440 hours, 86,400 minutes, 5,184,000 seconds! Without you!"

"You were able to figure that out in your head?"

"Huh? No I did it earli-hey! Don't try to change the subject! The point is, you're going to be gone that whole time! Who's going to fill that void, that niche, that special place? Who's gonna be my arch nemesis when you're away?"

"What about Daz? I thought she was your arch nemesis, or whatever."

"Daz doesn't count. She's not as nice as you, and she's completely invincible anyways." 

"Why, thank you. And no, Daz has got some weaknesses. We-"

" '-Just haven't figured them out yet' I know."

"It's time for me to go. I'll see you in two months."

"Kat! Wait!"

"Yeah?"

"I...I'll miss you."

"Me too."

And that's how it ended. My adversary gone, just like that. To tell the truth, I felt numb. Unfeeling. My mind had not wanted to accept that fact, and it hadn't. 

"Just two months. Nothing to worry about. She'll be back before I know it."

I waited. No answer. Although it hurt to admit it, I missed Kat. I missed her smiling face, her friendly nature. I missed the way her voice rang out in laughter after she had just destroyed one after another of my evil and complicated devices. No, wait. I didn't miss that. Everything else, yeah. 

Isn't it stupid that you don't know what you have until it is lost? Kat and I could have been friends, and in a sense, we kind of were. It just took losing her to figure that out. 

Well, fine. I'll be able to tell her that when she comes back. Perhaps at the end of a gun. Hah! 

Ally leaned back in her chair. She slumped, deep in thought, curling a bit of blonde hair with her fingers. With Kat gone, who was going to foil her evil plans? Daz maybe, but she wasn't around as much. Most often in her hidden lab, where Ally still hadn't figured out where that was located. 

Jessie couldn't: She was stuck baby-sitting her little sister. Who else? Nobody else really minded it that much. And unless some hero stepped up to the plate...

"...Then the world is mine!" Ally began to break into another fit of evil laugher, but stopped. "Although it won't bring much satisfaction to go unchallenged...Ah well. Can't do anything about that. Now, down to business!"

She scooted off her chair and made her way to what she called The Computer Room. Inside was a simple Macintosh (Ally never could put up with Microsoft Windows) a phone, printer, scanner, and speakers. 

The computer glowed as Ally flipped the switch. An annoying "You've Got Mail!" message popped up onto the screen. A cheery smile accompanied the message. Glowering, Ally clicked on it. The smile then proceeded to explode into a thousand microchip pieces and the message was opened.

A small mousey man with a moustache and thick cheekbones waved at her from the screen. 

"Hello there! I trust you're feeling your best? " Ally nodded in response. The man continued: 

"I have called you on a matter of great importance!"

She waited. 

The man smiled.

She grew impatient. "AND?"

The man stared blankly, then "Oh! Forgive me, I seem to be a little scatterbrained today!"

"Today?"

The man cleared his throat, blushing. "Well, um, heh. Any-hoo, the matter upon which I must call you about is, as I HAVE already told you, of great importance!" Here came a sly smile. "It concerns your little friend...Kat, was it?"

Ally sat up, concerned. "Kat? What happened? Is she-Hey! Kat is NOT my friend! And who the hell are you, anyways?"

Here the man laughed. "She is fine. Well...for the moment. I have come to warn you. This Kat of yours is wanted by my Master. He has taken her to a faraway land somewhere in the Artic desert."

"...."

"Just thought you'd like to know that" The man disappeared from the computer screen.

A small android with orange eyes walked into the room, seating himself on an opposite chair. "Who was that?"

Ally looked up. "I don't know, Tinew. How did he get our number?"

Tinew shrugged. "Well, what'd he want?"

"He told me Kat was in trouble."

"Kat?! ...Why would he do that?"

"I don't really know. Maybe he wanted to warn us?"

"Most likely trap us."

"That's stupid. But so are a lot of people these days. Let's go."

"Go? Go where?" 

"To save Kat of course."

"I thought you hated Kat. And aren't you the one who does the kidnapping, and she's the one who always saves everybody?"

"I figured under the circumstances a changing of roles was in order. Let's GO."

"Can I drive?"

"No."

The peaceful tranquility of a nearby park was immediately shattered. Birds, bunnies, and other small, sickenly cute animals dived to get out of the way of a piece of concrete slab that was rising out of the paved path. The slab moved to the side, and a small blue ship arose out of the gaping hole in the ground. 

The ship was a sleek, fast machine; painted luminous blue with orange flames, by Ally herself. The structure itself was basic. A round internal cavity with two large engines propelling from the sides, just large enough for two passengers. No extra inconveniences, no largely extravagant designs. Small, simple, and efficient.

Ally sat in the pilot's chair, stroking the dashboard lovingly. She had a lot of memories that recollected just by sitting in the comfortable leather seats that Tinew so snuggled in at the moment. 

Ally entered a few coordinates into the ship's computer. It buzzed to life with a glow of pale yellow. A yellow smiley face appeared on the modem to greet her.

"Hello there!" Said the face, "It certainly is a nice day out! Perfect for a cup of tea! Would you like me to brew some?"

Ally shifted uncomfortably. "Er, no, that's okay. I'd just like to -"

"Or perhaps you would like to go on a picnic!" Interrupted the cheery computer, "I know I would!"

"No, no, really, I don't WANT-"

"And it's PERFECT weather for a day at the beach!"

"NO! No tea, no, picnic, no beach!"

"No beach?"

"No."

The eyes of the computer welled up into pale blue tears. 

Ally blinked. Oh dear god..."Well, maybe tomorrow."

Instantly the computer's mood was lifted. "Promise?"

"We'll see."

Tinew sat up. "Alrighty, Mista Computadora! Autopilot control, set for Artic desert!"

Ally pulled out a map, scanning it. "No, wait. Computer..." She glanced at Tinew. "...Dora." Tinew cheered. "Manual control of the ship please."

Tinew stared at her. "Manual?"

The computer stupidly echoed his surprise. "Manual?"

Ally rolled her eyes. "YES, manual. If I may borrow a line from Harrison Ford, it's not something to be discussed with the committee. Now give me manual override!"

The computer sighed longingly. "Oh, very well then." And manual override was activated. 

Clutching the throttle, Ally stared hungrily out the windshield. She had forgotten what it was like to pilot. Most of the time the computer did all the work. 

Bringing the ship into an easy hovering motion, she then calculated how long it would take to-

"Are we THERE yet?"

Tinew's whining brought her out of the little thinking coma she had drawn herself into. 

"Another ten minutes Tinew." 

Tinew's eyes lit up. "Hey 'Dora, that's enough time for the pie song!"

Ally groaned. "Oh Tinew, PLEASE, do we HAVE to?"

But both the computer and Tinew had already begun singing. 

"BYE-BYE MISS AMERICAN PIE, DROVE MAH SHEVVY TO THE LEVY BUT THE LEVY WAS DRY! AND GOOD OL' BOYS DRINKIN' WHISKEY AND RYE, SINGIN' THIS'LL BE THE DAY THAT I DIE! THIS'LL BE THE DAY THAT I DIE!!"

Needless to say, neither could sing very well. 

Irritated and full of headaches, Ally landed her Voot Cruiser on a well-mowed front lawn, the lawn of-

"Dib's house?" Said Tinew, peering out a window. "Why we here?"

Ally unbuckled her seatbelt and strode across the grass, forcing Tinew to follow her. "Well, I can't possibly go and rescue Kat alone, you know, and I have absolutely no idea as to where Daz is, so the best place to start looking is here."

Tinew's friendly face dissolved into a frown. "Don't both Daz and Dib hate you?"

Ally laughed, trying to conceal an oncoming nervous breakdown. "Why, of course not! Don't be silly! We're old friends, us three! Hehehe...heh...Oh dear god..."

With those final words she walked to the porch and rang the doorbell. 

Gaz bent over her Game Slave 2, staring intently at the glowing screen. Nearby, Dib clutched his soda. He was trying, very quietly, to sneak against the room, but sure enough...

"Be QUIET, Dib!"

"Really Gaz, I was trying to-"

"QUIET! I'm on the last level!"

Dib peered over her shoulder. "No you're not."

"What?"

"You're not on the last level."

Gaz was at a lost of what to say. There was an awkward pause. 

Luckily, at that particular moment the doorbell rang and Dib was saved answering to his sister. He skipped to the door and threw it open.

Ally swallowed, and forced a grin. "Hey, Dib." Tinew waved.

Dib stared, frozen in shock. This lasted about two seconds, before his wide mouth opened up to release a scream with a pitch too high for most normal boys. He slammed the door in Ally's face, and dashed upstairs to his room.

Ally stared at the closed door. "Well, that could have gone better." In response, Tinew stuck his tongue out at the door. 

Dib raced up the stairs, and burst through his bedroom door. Daz sat on his bed, fuming over the smoking remains of her laptop. 

"Daz! Daz! There's an alien on my doorstep!"

She looked up. "An alien? Zim?"

"No, no, that other one! She's here!"

"Ally? Did you ask her what she wants?"

"What she WANTS? It's obvious, isn't it? She wants to fry us, cook us alive! Kill us with some alien ray gun! Or, if indeed possible, conquer the world!"

"Gasp! You're right, Dib! Don't worry, the world is safe while we're still around!" And with that, Daz closed her laptop and followed Dib downstairs. 

Dib flung open the door once again. They looked around. The alien menace was no longer on the doorstep. 

Instead, both Ally and her SIR unit Tinew were busy climbing rather disappointedly into their ship still parked upon the lawn. It took Daz a full ten seconds to notice this. 

"YOU!" Daz yelled, outraged.

"Er...you!" Ally yelled back. "You...you....how you doing?" 

Daz and Dib glared solemnly at Ally. She shrank back. Tinew whispered to her; "This doesn't look good." 


	2. Kat meets her doomed, doomed fate

Summer Days-2 Month Break From Life 

Chapter 2

(When last we left them, Dib and Daz were outside upon DibÕs lawn, only just realizing that Ally and Tinew had arrived. Overreacting as usual, the two trench coat-outfitted young persons were about to wage war with the alien menace. But let us take a break from THAT scene, and move to THIS oneÉ)

In the beginning, there was darkness. Then pain. Then light.

To be more precise, Kat was unconscious, and woke with a splitting headache to greet her. She immediately noticed two things when she finally opened her eyes. 

The first was that she was upside down, held several inches above the ground by shackles that dangled her by the ankles. It was quite uncomfortable, as she would discover only seconds later. 

The second thing she noticed, in her small, little cell were the guards. They were quite small, and wore curious little black-and-white suits. At first, Kat believed herself to be hallucinating, and blinked a few more times to clear her blurred vision. That was then she realized what the guards were. 

They were penguins.

Cute penguins, Kat observed, but still penguins. And right now, these penguins had left her chained and immobile, without reason. 

ÒBad penguins!Ó She screeched at them. They paid her no mind, bred to be obedient but stupid. 

So there Kat dangled, helpless, hopeless, and without a cause. Why she was here left her wondering. She hung there for quite a bit, until the pain in her legs became almost unbearable and the headache grew worse from the rushing of blood to her head. 

It was also terribly cold, she noticed, shivering. And just when things were at their worst, the iron door was heaved open. 

A flood of light shone in KatÕs face, so bright that she shut her eyes, even when she heard footsteps entering the cell. 

They werenÕt very heavy footsteps, Kat believed. Sort of light, but with a purpose. Kind of like a prancing deer. Opening one eye, she found herself staring at a pair of black pants and the sharp edges of a trench coat. 

Gazing upwards, she strained to look into the face of her captor. And there, due to a lot of pain in her neck, she gazed into the eyes of-

ÒYou?Ó Kat began, confused.

Jhonen Vasquez smiled down at her. ÒMe.Ó He said calmly. It was not a very nice smile either. It was a smile that plainly said ÒI donÕt really like you, but IÕll smile and be happy for you until I find a means of disposing of youÓ

But Kat was oblivious to all this. She was still trying to get past her first instinct, ÒYOU?Ó

Now Jhonen was visibly irritated, ÒYes, me.Ó

ÒW-why? Why would you do this? YouÕre my idol!Ó

He glared at her. ÒWhy? ItÕs simple, really. But right now, as a means of annoying you further and of leaving you clueless to my schemes, IÕm not going to tell you.Ó

ÒBut then why did you come in here?Ó   
  
ÒIÉdonÕt know. To taunt you, I guess.Ó  
  
Kat glared at him. ÒYou know, up until this point I would have done anything for you. But thisÉthis just isnÕt nice.Ó

Jhonen sighed. ÒThat is partly the reason youÕre here. IÕve been trying to live a normal life, and conquering the world seemed like a good hobby. But with all these fans, like you out there distracting me, I never have the time. So IÕve just decided to obliterate you all.Ó  
  


Kat stared at him, a little overcome for words, but not quite. ÒI thought you werenÕt going to reveal you plans.Ó   
  


Jhonen blinked, then groaned. ÒI did, didnÕt I?Ó She nodded. ÒVery well then! IÕll just have to make short work of you first, then I will continue my plans!Ó

ÒI canÕt believe youÕre doing this to me, Mr. Vasquez.Ó 

Jhonen laughed. ÒAll part of my plan. YouÕll understand whenÉwhen I feel like explaining it.Ó And with that, he strode out of the room. The penguins locked the door behind him. 

Kat stared straight ahead. That was the only direction she could stare at without breaking her neck. 

(And thatÕs it. A bit angsty, I know. The next chapter will be longer, promise!)


	3. The Lie Detector

Summer Days-2 Month Break from Life

Chapter Three

(Last chapter, Kat had just met face to face with her supposed idol, Jhonen Vasquez. But let us journey back to the confrontation at DibÕs houseÉ)

ÒI should have known it was you, alien scum.Ó Daz snarled. Ally sat patiently in her Voot Cruiser, a neutral look on her face. She had promised herself not to get mad at anything either would say, but it was extremely hard, ignoring her instincts as she was now. 

Dib was a bit more tactful, but not quite. ÒWhat do you want from us?Ó He shouted, still clutching a stun gun in case the answer wasnÕt one he agreed with. 

The shipÕs occupant shifted uncomfortably. She didnÕt want this to turn into just another bloody brawl, as was so frequent with conversations with Daz. ÒJust a simple, intelligent conversation would be nice!Ó She replied. 

Daz looked at Dib. Dib returned the glance. Then they both collapsed onto the grass, doubled over with laughter. 

Finally recovering five minutes later, Daz sat up. ÒWhen have you last wanted just Ôto talkÕ, Ally? DonÕt play games with us! WhereÕs your big, scary weapon you built to destroy us so we can go and neutralize it?Ó Dib still hadnÕt recovered from laughing. 

Ally slumped into her chair, fuming. This wasnÕt turning out at all like she had planned. Finally, she leaned out the window. ÒWould it make you feel any better if we went inside to talk?Ó 

Dib and Daz shared another look. Ally wouldnÕt have access to whatever gadgets she had in her ship, and there were plenty of restraining devices scattered about DibÕs room, just in case. 

ÒSure,Ó Dib started, ÒI guess that would be all right. ButÉÓ He glared at Ally, ÒNo tricks. And you have to leave your robot thing here.Ó 

ÒAgreed.Ó Ally hopped out of ship, and locked it. Tinew peered sadly out the window, but cheered up as she handed him the keys. ÒWheeee! I can listen to da radio!!Ó 

ÒNot too loud, okay?Ó

ÒI wonÕt!Ó He promised. And with that, Ally followed Dib into his house.

(MeanwhileÉ)

Kat was near passing out again. The bump on her head had already blurred her vision, and the amount of blood stored in her head at the moment must have been tremendous. Not to mention the chains on her ankles had numbed the entire lower half of her body. 

She couldnÕt scream; she couldnÕt think. All she could do was stare ahead blankly. At this point, death would be a relief. Instead she was here, hanging, lingering between life and death. 

Well, not anymore! Maybe, just maybe, if she swung her head into the concrete wall hard enough, she could give herself brain damage and finally end it all! It was a crazy plan, but who was to say Kat wasnÕt crazy herself?

She began to swing, back and forth to start up speed. Ever closer, she moved towards the wall. CloserÉcloser stillÉAnd then suddenly, she was interrupted. 

A small penguin guard entered the cell, clutching a plate of fruit. Nervously, he took out a set of keys and went to undo KatÕs locks. She waited with baited breath. Perhaps she wouldnÕt have to die after all! The locks snapped open, and Kat fell to the floor.

Head ringing, she tried to stand up. The pain she felt in her once-numb ankles drove her back to the floor. The penguin hobbled over to her. He held out the platter of food. 

Gratefully, she took it from him and began eating. She recognized the fruit; peaches, though once ripe, were now rotten and spotted. Still, she swallowed them. 

She looked into the eyes of her captor. The penguin was humanlike in nature, and glared back at her. There was an intense look behind the stare, as if he wanted to tell Kat something. 

ÒOhÉI know!Ó Kat suddenly realized. ÒYou want me to scratch your tummy! Okay!Ó And as she reached out her hand, the penguin flopped obediently in front of her. 

But instead of that, Kat whisked out her plate, now empty, and slammed it on top of the trusting penguinÕs head. As it sank into unconsciousness, Kat smiled. ÒStupid penguin.Ó She grabbed the keys, and ran.

(MeanwhileÉ)

Ally was almost bent over with humiliation. Dib would not allow her to enter his room without the proper ÔprecautionsÕ. Meaning, her back-pod was confiscated, and she was hooked up to a lie detector and strapped to a chair in the middle of the room. Both Daz and Dib were glaring at her peevishly. 

Dib began. ÒWhat do you want?Ó

She sighed. ÒI need your help.Ó The lie detector remained silent.

Then Daz started. ÒHelp with what?Ó

ÒRescuing Kat.Ó

Daz glanced at Dib, then at the detector, which hadnÕt moved a muscle.

ÒWhy should we help you?Ó  
  
ÒErÉbecause you owe me?Ó

ÒBZZZZ!!!Ó The detector crackled to life.

Ally shut her eyes. Thinking, she said. ÒBecauseÉbecause Kat deserves it?Ó

ÒBZZZZZ!!!Ó That detector was really starting to get annoying. 

ÒShe sighed. ÒBecause IÕm desperate, and have no other choice.Ó

There was silence. Dib looked to Daz, and Daz said, ÒWell, okay.Ó And She then unstrapped Ally from the device. 


	4. A prelude and the arrival

Chapter 4 

At this point, I would like to point out a couple of things: 

Kat in this story, is kat23a from fanfiction.net

Daz, in this story, is just plain Daz from fanfiction.net

Ally is obviously Invader Ally from fanfiction.net

Both Daz and Kat have some fantastic stories and I suggest you read them if you havenÕt already. 

Also, please ignore whatever stupid mistakes my Word program is doing to my fic, if you can. IÕm trying to fix it as it is. 

ThatÕsÉall I wanted to say. Thanks once again. 

Kat ran up and down the hallways, looking for a way out, or at least a clean bathroom. But each way she chose, it seemed she got even more lost, which was a pretty difficult thing to do, seeing as how clear, readable signs were posted at all available exits. But as it was known, if anybody could get lost in a brown paper bag, it was Kat. 

ÒI need a _sign._Ó Kat moaned, passing two red ÒEXITÓ signs. ÒPlease, canÕt somebody just give me a _hint_?Ó

Just then, she heard voices. Creeping closer to the door the voices seemed to be coming from, she peeked inside.

It was a circular room painted white. There were wires all around, leading to the center of the room, where a chair was planted. KatÕs eyes widened. Jhonen was in the room just then, and speaking to the person in the chair. Kat couldnÕt see the personÕs face.

Jhonen was talking now. It sounded as if he was threatening the person in the chair. Kat strained to hear the exact words, but she was too far away, and she was defiantly not going any closer. 

Suddenly, J.V. stopped talking, and looking in KatÕs direction. She quivered with fear. Had he heard her? Now it was of most importance to not make any noiseÉ

Kat sneezed. She couldnÕt help it. 

Immediately, two penguins jumped her and dragged her over the their leader, who smiled.

ÒWell, well, I see youÕve discovered all roads inevitably lead to Rome. I donÕt know how you escaped, but it doesnÕt matter; I was just going to send for you anyway.Ó 

She gulped, ÒYou were?Ó 

Jhonen nodded to a nearby penguin, which pressed in a few controls on the computerÕs keyboard. A second chair, back to back with the first, arose from the floor. Kat was then shoved roughly into it and strapped in. An odd device was attached to her head. 

_ÒWhatÕs this odd device attached to my head?Ó _Kat wondered. A sad little voice behind her answered; ÒItÕs a colander.Ó 

Kat was too shocked to wonder who was answering her. ÒA _colander?_ Why?Ó

ÒIts round metal surface is ideal for transmitting brain waves.Ó Said the voice. 

This meant as much to Kat as the prospect of life matters to a rock. ÒSo?Ó She asked. 

ÒYou donÕt know whatÕs going to happen?Ó replied the voice with a bit of disapprovement. 

Just then, the machine buzzed to life. A thousand volts of electricity flowed through the wires attached to the colander on KatÕs head. This shock was a bit much for her, and she began to scream. Somewhere in the back of her mind, while being introduced to so much pain, she noticed that the voice was also screaming, and Kat would have felt sorry for it, had she not been going through the same thing. 

She needed to focus on something, anything. She searched the white room for something to stare at, and focused on a pit of chocolate pudding on the floor that no one had bothered to clean up.

As Kat was staring at the piece of pudding, trying to ignore the pain, she realized something. ÒIÕm hungry.Ó 

(MeanwhileÉ)

Ally was itching all over with impatience. She sat in her Voot cruiser glaring venomously at Daz. Quite a while before, she had targeted KatÕs location on her computer, but before they could leave, Daz had insisted that they cram as many ÔvaluableÕ items in the trunk space as possible. 

Now it was an hour later, and the two paranormal abnormalities, as Ally affectionately thought of them, were still finding room in her cruiser for their enormously useless items. Every time Ally found the heart to complain, one or the other would fix her with a stare and murmur, ÒItÕs better to be safe than sorry.Ó In truth, she was ready to just forget Daz and Dib and go off to try and rescue Kat alone. 

Not that she _was_ alone, as both her computer and Tinew constantly reminded her. Tinew was whining and complaining that he needed to use the bathroom, and as she tried to explain to the android that it wasnÕt even possible for him to _do_ so, the VCÕs computer kept insisting that all Tinew needed was a warm cup of tea to feel better. 

Frankly, the alienÕs nerves were shot, and at long last both Dib and Daz climbed in next to her. Both of them felt the need to personally experiment with _all_ the buttons on the dashboard, until Ally physically restrained them with seatbelts, despite their half-hearted protests. 

Ally then locked the computer into auto control towards the point on the map she had previously targeted. All they needed to do now was wait. 

Five minutes later, her eyelids were heavy with boredom. The computer did not help to remedy this in the least, instead offering Dib a cup of tea, and in the minutes that followed, the fascinated boy would constantly ask questions such as; ÒHey, did you know your computer can make tea? Actual drinkable tea! Imagine that.Ó And other things of that nature. 

Conversations with Daz were equally fruitless. Being enemies for so long, neither could find a topic to discuss that would not in some way insult the other, and so Daz took to practicing her mysterious look of contentment. Unfortunately for her, this had no effect whatsoever on either Ally or Tinew, who ignored it or made faces back at her. So instead, Daz stared out the window, trying to ignore the reality of how high up they were. 

In the end, they did arrive in the middle of the Artic. The two humanoids were quite comfortable in their heavy layered trench coats, and Tinew was made of metal and couldnÕt feel, but it was a different story entirely for Ally. 

Never having seeing snow before, she carelessly hopped out of her cruiser, falling knee-deep into packed snow, and shrieked. Not only was this stuff _cold_, but it was also _wet_. The snow around her feet sizzled and melted as her boots being to burn. Quickly, she rose up on her spider legs, hanging several feet above the wondrous wasteland of filthy snow. 

Dib laughed. Tinew glared at Dib, and pushed his head into the snow. In response, Daz booted Tinew about twenty feet ahead. Ally caught him in her arms and sighed. What had she gotten herself into?

(Whee! Next chapter; what exactly happened to Kat! What happens to the rescue party! And the exact copy of the Declaration of Independence translated into Swedish!)

(Also, IÕm taking forms of people who want to be in this fic (WHO ARE NOT ALREADY IN THEM, KAT!) So if you wanna be in this frightening tale of doom and destruction, leave it in your review and IÕll stick you in it!)


	5. Kat the Penguin/Daz the Basement Bunny

Chapter 5 

If you are still with me till this chapter, I congratulate you. Either you really, really enjoy my story or you were bribed and constantly badgered (by me) to come here. 

Behold, the fifth installment of a hopelessly uncopyrighted fiction aptly named Summer Days; Two Month Break from Life. 

Kat opened her eyes. She was in the same room, with the same people, tied to the same exact chair, and yet everything was different. She no longer felt like she was going to drop dead of frostbite, but there was something more.

She blinked again. Had the room been this big before? And had the straps on her arms and legs fitted so loosely before the machine had been turned on?

She looked down at her feet, and shrieked. Jhonen Vasquez laughed cruelly. Kat had manifested into a penguin. 

Now that she had shrunk to a fraction of her original size, Kat easily escaped the chair. She looked herself over. She no longer had fingers, or toes, just flippers and webbed feet. Looking behind her, Kat could see the tip of a little black tail. 

Jhonen grinned at her panic-stricken face. ÒAnd how does it feel, little Kat, to be the embodiment of all evil?Ó

Kat looked up at him (and it was quite a long way to look) and grinned. She wobbled over on her short little legs and hugged Jhonen around his leg. He stared back at her, confused. 

ÒWhatÕs wrong? Why are you smiling? DonÕt smile, itÕs scaring me!Ó This only made Kat grin wider, and when she spoke, it was as if she were almost singing. 

ÒPenguins rock! TheyÕre cute, and cuddly, and fun! This has always been my dream, to be a cute, cuddly penguin! Thank you, thank you so very much!Ó She hugged him again. 

Jhonen Vasquez pushed her away. He twitched in fury. ÒYou LIKE being a penguin?! How could anyone possibly LIKE being a penguin?!Ó  
  
ÒQuite easily, I believe.Ó 

He let out a cry of frustration, and pointed to the exit. ÒGo! Get out of my sight! Never darken my mood with your presence, ever, ever again! And,Ó Here he reached to the chair that was behind KatÕs chair and pulled out a smaller, shorter and most defiantly cuter penguin, ÒTake this scum with you!Ó And with that, he flung the littler penguin at Kat and stormed away. 

Kat looked at the smaller penguin, which smiled a sheepish grin. ÒHi!Ó it squeaked. Kat recognized the voice as the one that had told her of the colander before they were turned into penguins. 

ÒMy name is Irken Insane,Ó continued the penguin. ÒAnd I like penguins too! I can tell already weÕre going to be good friends!Ó She hugged Kat around her large penguin-y middle. 

Hesitantly, Kat hugged Irken Insane back, and smiled. ÒLetÕs go see what havoc we can wreak!Ó 

(Meanwhile)

The rescue party had walked for many miles across the frozen wasteland, and still had not found Kat. Irritated, Daz asked (none too politely) if Ally knew where she was going.

ÒWell, weÕre certainly going somewhere, and coincidently Kat is also at a somewhere, and if you would put two and two together, somewhere is the somewhere we are going, and somewhere is the exact location of Kat.Ó Was her overly detailed reply. 

To this, Ally received a face full of snow and so then had to stop and apply ointment and the right amount of insults to accompany it. 

Through some intense and rare coincidence, the group did arrive at a somewhere. This somewhere wasnÕt the somewhere that Kat was at, but as Ally cheerfully noticed, it was a somewhere in particular, which means they must be getting close. 

This specific somewhere was a small tribal village, home to the snow people who ate rather nasty things. Grateful that a somewhere was discovered, the insane little collection of renegades ignored the Keep Out signs posted at the edge of the somewhere and entered the village. 

Immediately, they were surrounded by angry tribal polar bears that were already upset at not having their fur groomed today and so were extremely vengeful. Thinking fast, Dib pulled out his lucky jar of hair gel, and flung it as far as he could into the nearest ocean, screaming, ÒFetch! Fetch!Ó

Alas, the water was too cold and too polluted with baseballs that the polar bears dared not throw themselves in. Angry at the lost of a perfectly good jar of gel, they snatched the shaken travelers up in their massive jaws and proceeded to bury them deep under the snow to eat later. 

By the time the four were able to climb out, Dib was shivering, TinewÕs head was filled with snow, Daz was nearly apoplectic and ready to release her rage over the polar bears (whoÕd by now had left to find something more interesting to do) and Ally was burning like a candle. Unfortunately, this caused the snow around her to melt, getting her even more soaked. 

When all four had safely climbed out, they were met by a little laughing girl. The stranger was giggling, and sitting upon a baby polar bear. Almost all of her was covered with thick fur coats, but her face was still visible, and her laughing voice was unfortunately audible. 

When she had finally ceased laughing, they were all nearly dry, and glaring at her. 

  
ÒPardon me,Ó she squeaked, ÒBut you are indeed very funny! Bears bury you alive, yes! Very, very funny!Ó

ÒAnd who might you be?Ó spat Daz angrily. Her hand already was clutching her lazer gun. 

The girl jumped off the polar bear and bowed low. ÒI am the one known as Invader Zaifae, at your service!Ó This seemed to make her laugh harder. 

Dib moved as if he was going to hurt her, but Daz had already acted first. Whipping out her lazer, she blasted the polar bear into tiny little pieces. Smirking a satisfied grin, she put away her lazer for later use. 

Invader Zaifae stared at her in shock. ÒYouÉkilled itÉmy poor, littleÉÓ Pulling back her long coated sleeves, she waved her arms around dramatically, and produced a blinding blue light, which enveloped Daz. 

Dib shrieked and jumped back, Ally and Tinew stared, stricken. The light died away, and there was no Daz to be seen. Instead, a little black and purple-colored bunny remained. Invader Zaifae looked down at it, glowering. 

ÒMay you haunt the underworld basements for all eternity.Ó She threatened, and disappeared in another blinding light. 

What Daz said next would most likely change the ratings of this fiction dramatically, as well as teach several new words to younger readers. In light of this, we will skip over that part and continue our journey from there. 

After getting out of the first shock of finding yourself turned into a basement bunny rabbit, Daz rather liked the advantages. Her long, powerful hind legs propelled her faster than Dib could keep up. Her coat made her nice and warm, and she was light enough not to sink through the snow and instead could walk on top of it. 

After this brief and rather unexpected interlude, the group continued their journey in the same fashion, if not happily. 

ÒWell, I guess weÕre back in nowhere now.Ó Tinew spoke sadly. 

ÒDonÕt be so sure.Ó Ally smiled. ÒIf IÕm not mistaken, that castle up ahead is indeed a somewhere. I wonder who the someone is that lives in that place.Ó 

ÒOne way to find out.Ó Dib answered grimly. They purged ahead to their oncoming fate. 


End file.
